Dallas is one of those cities you forget about … or, should I say, that I forgot about.  Last time I was in town was 2001 … and I didn’t do any sightseeing whatsoever.  Last weekend, I more than made up for it … while eating my way through the city.

Dallas has a long, illustrious past.  For the longest time, the entire city felt immense remorse … like they were somehow responsible for the assassination of JFK in 1963.  Then, of course, the city had a renaissance in the ‘80’s thanks to the immensely popular TV show “Dallas” starring Larry Hagman.

And while I didn’t see Larry Hagman while I was in town, I did make a pilgrimage to the 6^th Floor Book Depository.  I saw the spot where Lee Harvey Oswald forever changed the nation.  It’s been turned in to a user-friendly museum where you walk through a timeline of the day’s events on November 22^nd.   I simultaneously had goose bumps while the hairs on the back of my neck were standing up the entire time I was in there.

I visited Dallas to see my good friend Ron Corning, who I met way back in 1994 in St. Louis – uh, when we were both in our teens.  He’s had a meteoric rise to fame as an anchorman (both local and national), and just landed a sweet gig at WFAA-TV.  I hadn’t been in his car for more than five minutes when I spotted a gigantic billboard with his mug on it.  Before I had a chance to comment on it, I spotted his pearly whites beaming from the side of a bus driving beside us.  “You’re kind of a big deal,” I laughed.  The always-humble Ron said, “Nah, it’s just my welcome to the city.”  You’ll notice that they’re playing up the “Corning in the Morning” tagline … which is both memorable and humorous.

The weather could not have been more gorgeous the entire weekend.  After a summer of squelching 100+ degree days in the Lone Star State, the temperatures have finally settled down.  Mother Nature must have known about my aversion to sweating.

Because I make a friend wherever I go, I wasn’t at a loss when trying to dazzle Ron’s friends.  They like to eat as much as I do, mercifully.  I met his friend, Lisa, an entrepreneur who sells her Liscaro scarves and hair-wares on QVC.  And we also had brunch with another gal pal of his, Courtney Kerr who is the resident southern belle on Bravo’s “Most Eligible Dallas”.  Sheesh — Ron’s been in town ten minutes and he’s already A-list.

I also got the chance to hang with my dear friend Jen Colella – who I haven’t seen since we traipsed around Rome in 2000.  She spent the weekend hanging out with us boys … and seemed to acclimate quite well.  Well, that and we all went to go see Blondie in concert and shook our groove thang all night.  Jen was a professional dancer for years – so I had to step it up a notch or two … or ten.  I nearly threw out my hip trying to keep up with her.  Happens.

Would I move to Dallas?  Yes, in a heartbeat … but only between the months of September-May.  I can’t take 70+ days of 100 degree heat.  I don’t think any human can … save for the 5.5 million folks who live there.  All y’all are crazy.

I hosted a social experiment last night called the “Meet Market”.

It was a glorified single mingle where 30-somethings and 40-somethings came together to meet each other.  The premise?  Instead of online dating (or virtual conversing via IM), people were encouraged to actually give human interaction a chance for once.  I mean, that sort of thing happens all the time, but not in a controlled situation.  With liquor.  Right?

Of course, people ate it up.

The inaugural event went relatively smoothly … meaning no one got slapped, groped or so drunk they puked off the balcony.

In a lot of ways, it was a sixth grade mixer all over again.  For a while, the boys were on one side of the room and the girls were on the other.  Fortunately for all genders, I was there to stir up the pot.  I relentlessly mocked, chastised and berated people who were standing as stiff as the rod that was up their ass. Since I was hosting, I was also able to scope out everyone’s mating rituals.  There were the tarted-up women who looked uncomfortable in clothes that were too tight and heels that were too severe.  Some of the guys were wearing so much cologne they had stink lines coming off them like Peanut’s Pigpen.  Others were cool and aloof and flirted from afar. Everyone there could be categorized.  There were certain degrees of desperation – like the “serial conversationalist” who tried his best to shoehorn in on any lull in the banter.  One of my friends even went out and bought and entirely new ensemble seconds before the event.  He looked cool, but you could tell he was uncomfortable in his new threads.  At least he remembered to take the tags off. My favorites were the ones who turned to me for advice.  “See that guy over there?” asked one of the hopefuls.  “Do you think he’s making eyes at me?  Or am I insane?”  I said in my most no-nonsense voice, “He’s clearly making googley eyes at you.  Now you can go over and talk to him or you can cover yourself with leaves and hope he falls in.”  She got the memo and instigated dialogue.

Single people are everywhere.  Schools. Churches. Grocery stores. I can’t believe it took an event like Meet Market to bring people together.  Good thing it did though.  I’m hosting the next four events.  Just call me Matchmaker M2. (Or is that M3?)