Dearest Julie Brown … you make me laugh.  For years you made dorm life almost bearable in the late ‘80’s/early 90’s thanks to your groundbreaking MTV series Just Say Julie.  You were able to take a video, mockingly rip it to shreds and still have all of America adoring you.  My life would not have been complete without watching you skewer everyone from Milli Vanilli to Madonna.  (That watermelon scene in “Medusa:  Dare To Be Truthful” made me pee myself.  A little.) You were two parts acerbic, one part scathing and one part irreverent.  It was the perfect recipe for disrespecting anyone and everyone.

And then, not unlike Exposé, you disappeared.  (I wasn’t really bummed about Expose’.  But I was absolutely devastated when you went MIA.) Oh sure, you popped up in “Quantum Leap” and “Clueless”, but it just wasn’t the same.  There were a whole new slew of pop stars that I wanted to see you lambast.  Well that … and Paula Abdul.   She’s like a cockroach that never went away.

I was practically giddy when we became friends on Facebook.  I’d write you long, poignant messages about the good ol’ days.  You’d ignore me.  Face it … we had become fast friends.  And even though you’d never get back to me, I knew we’d be lifelong pals.  (Come to think of it, I’m friends with Valerie Harper and ALF too … and they never respond either.  It’s likely a Facebook glitch, yes?)

But now, like manna from Heaven, you’ve reigned down upon us with new tunes and a new attitude.  And the best part?  You still have big hair.  Put aside your silly lyrics, zany mantra and enormous bazoombas for a moment.  The thing I cherish about you the most is your fiery ginger mane.  (Did that sound dirty?) It’s like a big red swirl of cotton candy.

Now that you’re back on the scene, I see the first person out of the gate that you chose to parody is Ke$ha.  She’s such a skank.  And she’s ripe for the picking.  The song is brilliant.  The video is brilliant.  And you’re brilliant.

I’m glad your back, woman.  All is right with the world.  It’s like I’ve always said, “If Bananarama can still make music, then where, oh where, is my beloved Julie Brown?”  (Actually, I’ve never said that, but it sounded good and I really need to wrap this blog up in a nice little bow.  Just sayin’.)

All my best,

Your bestie BFF,

M2, Esq.

PS.  Call me … we’ll do lunch.

PPS.  XOXO!

PPPS.  Happy New Year!