How do I love thee, Carson Kressley?  Let me count the ways.

Ever since the formidable fashionista debuted on “Queer Eye For The Straight Guy” a hundred million years ago, I’ve strived to be as irreverent and sassy as he is.  He’s quick with a seemingly spontaneous quip … and snarky when warranted.

If I didn’t know any better, I’d say we were separated at birth.  (Although I’m sure my parents would beg to differ.)  He’s like the big sister I always wanted.

To say I was excited to potentially meet him at the recent GLAAD Media Awards was an understatement.  Like any giddy doppelganger, I stalked him accordingly on Facebook.  I even came up with a secret code word to yell at him, lest his publicist should whisk him away before our one-on-one MoxieQ interview.  I must have made a lasting impression because when he saw me, we both yelled out “Farfegnugen” in unison, which was followed by some high-pitched cackling and jumping up and down.  Oddly, no one around us even batted a perfectly sculptured fake eyelash.

Lately The Kressler has been everywhere.  He was on last season’s “Dancing With The Stars”, he’s splashed on “Good Morning America” and, of course, he’s tight with The Big O, Oprah herself.  Of course, I had to ask what hanging with Oprah is like.  (Or Miss Winfrey, if you’re nasty.)

Some things to note about the interview: Yes, I’m completely manic and I’ll be the first to admit it.  Stupid nerves.  I would have bitch-slapped myself, but I was waiting for Carson to do it.  And I purposefully forgot to bring up Carson’s love of horses since I have a completely irrational fear of any/all equines.

Carson talks fast, smells good and darts around like a hyperactive hummingbird.  He was a huge hit on the red carpet because every interviewer knew they would come away with great material.  Heck, he even complimented what I was wearing (after a wee bit of prompting from the peanut gallery).

Little known fact … when I did a series of fashion-friendly webisodes for Halls a few years ago, I channeled my inner Carson.  Some people have bracelets that say “WWJD” … mine says, “WWCT” (What Would Carson Think?).

Even though we’re only a few months apart in age, I’d still like to say that I want to be Carson when I grow up.  Why?  Because he’s inspiring AND inappropriate.  No wonder I bow down to him.