For the past few years, I’ve kept a running list of things I’ve learned over the previous 365 days. Mostly for me. Then someone said, “You should turn this shiz into a blog.”

Another friend added, “I’m not the only one who enjoys your writing … uh, and I definitely can’t be the only one who enjoys making fun of it.”

If that’s not a glowing endorsement, I don’t know what is.

So, here are a dozen things — in no particular order — that stuck this year:

12) “Please Stop Talking” cards … for the win.
Last year, a friend handed me business cards that simply read: Please stop talking. Delicate, demur font. Brutal message. “You’ll know when to use them,” she said. She was right. I carry them everywhere. Society has never been better.

11) Security cameras … for the win.
I finally invested in a legit outdoor camera. The clarity is borderline unsettling. My neighbor walked outside holding a coffee cup and I could read the logo. Mesmerizing. Slightly dystopian. Worth every peace-of-mind penny.

10) Chip dip … for the win.
At a chef’s house for breakfast, I watched him add a generous scoop of French onion dip into his omelet mix. I was horrified. Then he added more and whipped it in. “It makes them fluffy,” he said. Reader, it does. Life changed.

9) Networking … for the win.
I spent last year shaking hands and making small talk like it was an Olympic sport. Exhausting? Yes. Effective? Also, yes. Turns out, clients do not magically fall into your lap. Who knew? Thanks to my hobbing and nobbing, I now have a dozen new freelance clients. (A record!)

8) Palo santo … for the win.
I’m already deep in the woo-woo world, but palo santo is next-level. If sage clears the bad, palo santo brings the good back in. Burn those lil’ cones accordingly. Watch your mood shift. Watch everyone’s mood shift.

7) Samba … for the win.
When it’s not 80s dance music, it’s samba at Casa Mackie. Bright, catchy, impossible to ignore. Ask Alexa to put it on, and suddenly you’re in a better headspace without knowing why. (It’s the syncopated rhythms, people!) Bonus points if palo santo is also involved.

6) Grapefruit-mint candles … for the win.
I have three burning as I type this. Odd combo? Yes. Magical? Also, yes. Instant clarity. Just don’t get fancy. Grapefruit-mint only. No rogue third or fourth scent allowed. I mean it.

5) Industrial air purifier … for the win.
I saw one in a spotless artist studio and immediately bought it. When I changed the filter, I nearly gagged. The amount of dust and God-knows-what it sucked up? Criminal. I now live in what feels like a pristine-room fantasy.

4) Framing … for the win.
If it brings you even a sliver of joy, frame it. Properly. I splurged on framing a limited-edition set of rainbow albums from The B-52s. It’s the first thing you see when you walk in. Worth it. Conversation piece, every damn time. (Thanks, Pedro! Go visit him at Quality Framing and Art in Mission.)

3) Closet clearing … for the win.
Once a month, I picked a closet and went to war. Overstuffed, chaotic, mildly dangerous closets. Gone. Donated, organized, wiped down. Goodwill now greets me by name. Progress.

2) Self-promoting the living bejeezus out of yourself … for the win
When I joke that I’d sign copies of my book in a dark alley, I’m not kidding.

Turns out, if you actually talk about your work — loudly and often — people notice. Wild concept. My humor book is finally starting to earn back what I put into it, and it’s led to speaking gigs, emcee gigs, and opportunities I didn’t see coming.

None of that happens if you whisper about it. You have to yell it from the rooftop. (PS: If you don’t toot your own horn, ain’t nobody else gonna do it.)

1) Letting go … for the win
My friend Katie throws around the word perseverate like it’s a battle cry. “Stop perseverating on things you can’t control.” Reader, I had to Google it. Turns out, it means obsessing over the same thought on an endless loop. Which, apparently, I’ve been doing like it’s my life’s ambition. Uh, it’s a work in progress.

Hell, I’m a work in progress. I deserve a medal, people. That beings said, I hope one or ten of these nuggets resonated with you this year. (Seriously. Go buy that grapefruit-mint candle NOW!)