Hoedown vs. Hoot’nanny — Part I

My dear friend Laura Booth got married over the weekend.  In Milan, Missouri.  Which is – I kid you not – in the middle of nowhere.  I know that because I did not have cell phone reception – even in roam-mode.  It was, by far, the oddest wedding/reception I’ve ever been to … but that’s just because I typically don’t have to watch out for cow patties when I’m dressed up. 

Everything about the wedding had Laura written all over it.  She’s a radical free spirit who quit her corporate advertising gig to become a farmer in the dell.  Or something like that.  

Clearly, she’s nuts. 

Laura was stunning and literally beamed from head to toe.  I wore sunglasses around her all day.  1) because she was glowing from being the blushing bride and 2) I was hoping no one would recognize me. 

The wedding was officiated by a Puerto Rican minister – a recent transplant to the U.S. – who had never presided over a wedding before.  He was clearly nervous.  And sounded a bit like Charo.  But he did a fine job up until the point he introduced “Mr. and Mrs. Laura Booth”.  I’m still not sure he realized his gaffe.  

The reception was held outside at the Booth’s farmstead … and it was the quintessential perfect fall day.  The sun was setting.  People were milling about.  And the horseflies were attacking.  Laura thanked everyone for coming … and since she’s a writer … her soliloquy was poignant and touching.  Her husband Adam bawled like a four year old girl during his speech … and instantly endeared himself to everyone on the planet. 

After that, things get a little fuzzy.  Guess the fact that I was guzzling wine caught up with me.  Or maybe it was the fresh air.  Who knows? 

I’ve known Laura nearly five years … she’s a true friend and crazy-hella-talented.  How many people do you know that have decided to throw caution to the wind to start a new gig?  Laura has decided to immerse herself in the dairy industry with wild abandon.  It’s her homage to fromage.   

Part of me wants to applaud her for trying something new.  The other part of me is still shaking my head in mock disbelief.  But regardless, I’m going to be supportive of her choice in spite of my lactose intolerance.  

Nevertheless, I love her and her new endeavor!  I think of it as trial by cheese.  But her future is so bright – she’s gotta wear shades.  She’s a phenomenal writer … albeit not as good as me … but whatever.  And I’m sure she’s going to be a phenomenal farmer.   And someday when she publishes her first memoir it’s going to be a best seller.  Dare I say, it’ll be a cash cow.